I'll see your South Bronx and raise you an epic blowout.

Let me just say that this was so bad I had to change my own clothes before I could even begin to work on the babe. From here on out, all diaper edges will be sealed with duct tape.

For some reason it smelled like horse manure.

This is the inside of his once cute outfit.

I considered cutting it off of him so I wouldn't have to drag it over his head.

List of items damaged in event:

1. Monkey onesie

2. Monkey footie pants

3. Sleep sack

4. Changing table cover

5. Mommy's tank top

6. Mommy's pants

7. Mommy's will to live